& I think I won

Roxanne, it's the 12th of December, Twenty Twenty One, &

I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won & I think I won.

I want things to change and this is a record of it all. This is a record of every past self lost in hopes of rebuilding something close enough in the future. A shattered mirror can become a doll if she tries hard enough. Can't I?

Why was I afraid of this dog? Can I even remember? She eats people. I remember she eats people. Someone told me she eats people but I never found anything that made that true. A long time ago it brought me so much joy but I had to part with it. She eats people. I wasn't around allowed it anymore. It wasn't a decision I was allowed to make. It simply was reality. I couldn't play with those toys or speak to those spectres anymore. I can't use the tongue I used to because it was uncouth. I made a deal with mother and got it back at a cost.

"You have to kill her universe if you want your voice back"

& so I did.

I haven't looked back since.